This morning I read Ephesians 6:1-4. I’ve read it many times before but for some reason today it hit me in a totally differently way. 

“Children, obey your parents because you belong to the Lord, for this is the right thing to do. 

“Honor your father and mother.” This is the first commandment with a promise: If you honor your father and mother, “things will go well for you, and you will have a long life on the earth.” Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger by the way you treat them. Rather, bring them up with the discipline and instruction that comes from the Lord.”

‭‭Ephesians‬ ‭6:1-4‬ ‭NLT‬‬
I know that I am to obey my parents and in so doing I am also honoring them. Sometimes that is really hard since I am an adult with my own children. I am thankful that my parents and I seem to have fallen into a very compatible pattern over the last few years where there is mutual respect and a willingness to listen to each other rather than bicker over things. This certainly does not mean we always agree, but there seems little reason to fight. This makes obeying them much easier!
It was actually verse 4 that struck me this morning and the commentary from the NLT Life Application Study Bible. 
“Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger by the way you treat them. Rather, bring them up with the discipline and instruction that comes from the Lord.”

‭‭Ephesians‬ ‭6:4‬ ‭NLT‬‬
Man, this is hard. I know that one of the sins that I struggle with and the Lord is constantly calling me on is my temper. This is especially true when I am disciplining my boys. I know I am strict on some issues that are simply non-negotiable in our home, for that I do not apologize. However, the Lord has ways to enforce the rules that “comes from” Him. It’s when I step out of those guidelines that I should apologize, first to my Lord and then to my children. Not always easy to do, but so very important. 

This is the commentary from my Bible:

“The purpose of parental discipline is to help children grow, not to exasperate and provoke them to anger or discouragement (see also Colossians 3:21). Parenting is not easy – it takes lots of patience to raise children in a loving, Christ honoring manner. But frustration and anger should not causes for discipline. Instead, parents should act in love, treating their children as Jesus treats the people He loves. This is vital to children’s development and to their understanding of what Christ is like.” NLTLASB
I can not express how hard this hit me. My children NEED me to discipline them, but in a manner that will encourage them and not discourage them. They NEED me to correct them, but not when I am angry so they learn how to control their own anger. They NEED me to lead and guide them, but not in ways that belittle or embarrass them so they grow up with confidence. 

This is how Christ has raised me since my infancy as a believer. 

I most certainly do not do all that He wants me to and I surely fail in the ways I try to do what He wants, but He is ever loving and kind in His discipline and gracious in His instruction. Reflecting on His word and His actions in my own life has lead me to this question:
How will my children, your children, ever come to know, love and trust our compassionate, just, kind, bigger-than-anything God if they don’t see Him in us first?